The Spirit of Magnolia

An infertility / adoption / pregnancy blog. After 3 MCs and IF testing (with no diagnosis) we shifted our focus to adoption. After being matched we discovered we were pregnant. After telling our agency about the pregnancy our match was severed. This is the story of our journey to parenthood.

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Location: Minnesota, United States

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

IDIOT at work

I am still dumbfounded as to what someone said to me today. I just cant believe someone would ever think this - let along actually VERBALIZE it ....

I was having difficulty locating a notary for some adoption paperwork today (the dossier paperwork required a specific type of stamp that is not the usual notary stamp). After making a ton of phone calls, to no avail, a coworker walked up to me and asked,
"Do you think this is God's way of telling you that you shouldn't adopt?"

What do you say to that?
My response: a strong "WHAT?" (while I picked my jaw up off the floor).
Her response: "It shouldn't be this difficult if it was what He wanted you to do".
My response: another strong "WHAT?" (as I bit my tongue so I wouldn't start SCREAMING at her). I informed her that this is what ALL adoptive parents must go through - its not just us!

I wanted to grab her and shake her!!!

To add insult to injury, this is the same coworker that pulled me aside earlier this month to tell me that she was 8-weeks pregnant (with her second child). She has been acting "Holier Than Thou" for weeks because God has blessed her with another child. Normally I would be happy for her but since she continually rubs my nose in it I REFUSE!!!

Don't get me wrong - I would not wish a miscarriage on ANYONE - EVER - but I cant help but wish that she could feel just a shred of the agony that Ive felt. I think she would change her tune then.

Ive said in the past that if biological parents had to go through the same things that adoptive parents had to go through then the birthrate would be cut in half.
Ive also said that adoptive parents are blessed to a higher degree than biological parents. I could be wrong on that one - but I'll never know since its highly unlikely that I'll ever be a biological parent and Im THRILLED about becoming an adoptive parent (hopefully SOON!)

4 Comments:

Blogger E. Phantzi said...

Man, what that woman said to you is crazy talk. Unbelievable.

10:04 AM  
Blogger katd said...

Wow; that's unreal. It's so hard to do, but please try not to let her have any sort of impact on you. You're doing the right thing! :)

3:20 PM  
Blogger E. Phantzi said...

Hey there - can you re-send me your e-mail? I seem to have misplaced it but want to add you as a reader.

10:34 AM  
Blogger Runergirl said...

Wow!!! Some people need real help. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

1:19 PM  

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